today was epic, the production was insanely good, dinner was funny though I was kinda dead before that due to certain reasons haha and meeting shaz was good and during the cab ride, bat kept on saying how much she misses drama alrdy and yes I do miss drama ALOT actually haha. Outing on wednesday!

I'll blog more tmr cause Im just really sick now haha.

Baking with the dramatis (haha, thats what bat's dad called us) was super fun, and epic and there was not a moment where I didnt laugh. QIstina's the next Martha Stewart haha she was really good and the cupcakes wouldve prob sucked if she wasnt there, awh. then Bat's parents sent me home and nad and hazwani and oh wow the car ride was hilarious. haha okay so Today was a blast, and good luck PBMC kids esp my dear drama kids. we'll kick ass and take names.

Today it really hit me that so many people will be gone next year/soon and how much I'll miss them, eventhough I dont talk alot to some of them much now but I still have the comfort knowing that they're near and that I can call/text/see them whenever I need or want to but I wont have that next time. With Os next year, I hope I wont be disconnected from everybody. I wouldnt want to be. The holidays 're prob gonna pass by ridiculously fast and I hope I spend it well with good people... and so far its been good.

yes I'm free for dinner on the 17th January.

today was good.

Went for PBMC and I laughed a whole damn lot. But kindof got moodswings?, haha I'd be happy for a minute then suddenly just very :/ but it was all good. Went for dunch with Hazwani, Addie, Qistina, Nad, Bat and Din beanz. It was two best things together at one place; food and good friends. Went home with Bat, and had a really good talk about almost everything, then her parents sent me home, and she mention things in the car to her parents that made me blush ttm hahaha. but it was great.

When I got home, the fam alrdy left for the hosp to see nenek chang so I couldnt go. Went to starbucks instead to do hmk. Aizat came after that since he was going to school to overnight. Decided to go for icecream so we bought a tub at cold storage and hunted for a place to sit until we decided on mandai park. By the time we got there, the ice cream was kinda really soft. haha. But it was great. talked about primary school, family, maids, A and B hahaha and gays and what not. It was a really good night, though mum was kinda freaked out when I got home cause my phone died and she couldnt reach me... and she told me about the girl who got gang raped at woodlands and that happened about a year ago? mothers....

today was really good, tmr will be my last training till I get back from Australia.. ): ohwell.

and cause satheesh says this is very motivational hahaha, Good Luck to my pals whose exams start tmr or anytime soon, You'll do great :D

today was blog worthy, haha.

Training was really loud and fun with the old folks back hahah and ms chew jr. it was good cause I kindof miss the sec 4s. :))))))) then went for pbmc for like a few minutes? hahah it was funny and I really miss the drama gang and cikgu was so funny omg hahah trying to imagine me clubbing seh. then went for lunch at pizza hut with addie, hudies and nad. hahaha best fun. giggled over pizza hut guys and talked and talked and talked, I was the caveman and that sucked hahaha

Somebody was late janji melayu lah. hahaha bought the tix and went for ben and jerrys, his treat since I had to wait for over half and hour under the hot sun haha. talked for 2 hours non stop. amazing. watched paranormal activity and it was quite -.- wasted an hour and a half of my life and the guy next to me was bloody loud and telling the whole story to his friend and spoilt the whole thing for me. after the movie we were like "uhm, okay?" haha it was only freaky cause we both thought it was real. hahaha then went to causeway for dinner, talked over crappy noodles and prawns and teh tarik till 10pm.

today was good

I'm sorry if the pic scares you and gives you nightmares like it did to me HAHAHAHA

love you too, hope you had a great 15th, :D

anyway, I hope everybody's well, if not then I hope things get better for you. and its unfair how I'm stuck here and Jeeva's there in Paris. ):

Today was perfect actually.

Woke up epicly early after only 3hours of sleep. Met Aizat for bfast at admiralty. We do what we do best. Eat and Talk. And since it was morning and we're really brave people. We told each other ghost stories. hah.

I was still late for training anyway, was quite frustrated and vulgar during training cause I couldnt get anything right. -.- So I am deeply sorry if got really pissed at you for no apparent reason. And we did sliding today~ It was all muddy and wet and I tore my favourite blue socks ;__; tragic. I'm gonna bury it and give it a proper funeral. After all the fun, we kinda quickly did andrea's card that dini made. but it was such a failure ttm. cause she prob saw it and it was all crumpled. But I bet Andrea were deeply touched by our efforts :D We went out for lunch at pizza hut, everybody went expt Gabbie D: even gloria went!!! we talked about all the good times when were in sec 1 and how nooby everybody was. And figuring out which shop represented everybody. hahah dini being the obvious~ The house of Condoms. hahahaha. So the lunch was oooookayyy, we were all kinda accident prone and I bet the pizza hut people hated us, and we made new friends at the next table too. I bet it was one of the best bday's you've ever had~
which reminds me, HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANDREA TAN QI YING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i hope you were touched by my note on the card :D AND I DREW THE FROG! thx


Went home with Linqi and once I got home, just died on the bed. Best nap in the world. The fam left for town and I didnt tag along. Woke up and met Aizat for Dinner. Had ban mian and its not exactly sitting well in my stomach. but tmi. After that, we went to TImezone and battled it out. haha I threw a basketball and it bounced out and I had no Idea where it went. We wanted to play Dance Dance Revolution but someone was too shy. haha But I totally pwned him at Guitar Heroes and Air Hockey. haha. It was all good

Today was great. and I cant wait to see Angah get married tmr. :D Finally one of my brothers are getting married...

How happy is the blameless vestel's lot!
The world forgetting, by the world forgot,
Eternal Sunshine of the spotless mind!
Each pray'r accepted, and each wish resign'd

Today was great.

I went for Production practice, was 3 hours late hahaha Im sorry bout that. Had a good time, Laughing, screaming, playing games. And we did a full dress rehearsal. I feel so weird in the Imam costume haha, But I’m a hip Iron maiden rocking Imam. :D

So I went to send mum’s netbook to samsung with Qistina after that. Which was epicly funny cause we were lost and decided to ask for directions. When I asked, where the building was, we were standing right next to the Samsung sign -.- HAHA. We went in there and pressed the que button a hundred times before realising it wasnt even on  hahah then realised that it was alrdy closed at 530 and it was 542 hahaha but the guy helped us anyway :D It was a funny adventure and it was good talking with Qistina.

Waited for Aizat for an hour+++ at starbucks, but it was worth the wait anyway. Talked and laughed as per normal.

It was a good day.

I hope things get better and this all just goes away cause I can only handle so much.

Malay's Olevels are over and I would not like to elaborate cause it was kindof bad

But anyway, met up with the team for lunch and physical was pretty fun, it was just mostly running and screaming and more running and more screaming. Was suppose to go gear shopping with Coach but he left and said we'd go on Thursdayyyyy :D

I went to the library too borrow books, was gonna get eat pray love or the lovely bones, but they were all on loan D: so I got this book called Guernica. Havent started yet but will sooooooon. and I met Abang Ijat today for dinner. that was really good.

that is all really, today not so happening. the rest of my holidays are production practices+training (x1000000000000)+Australia+a whole lot of funnnnnnnnn :D

a little late but

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRO!!!!!!!



miss you too and come back home soon k :D

( what I said on Tumblr... )


I dont know why, and we're probably never gonna happen, but meeting you again would be really good.

things havent been going great, but I shall not elaborate on that but thank god for all my good friends and cousins that never fail to make my day.

Other than that, school's been pretty okay. Intensives are bearable and I am still surviving. But I am so bloody freaked out about next year and malay Os, its taking over my life. Sad to say I dont even have the mood to train because I feel like I have to study NOW NOW NOW. this is so not happening to me. ugh D:  And this whole week I've spent a good amount of time with great company. And I have good things lined up for me this week and next. After Os please feel free to ask me out *winkz*

anyway HAPPY BIRTHDAY QISTINA!!!!
I dont have a picture with you or of you. so sorry bout that. But hope you had a good birthday and Cant wait for monday with Toffee Nut and a whole lot of gossip HAHAHAHA :D Love you too haha

p.s. Jeeva, you should go on skype now so I can tell you the good news HAHA, this will make you laugh till you pee your pants.

okay before I get to my work,

the morning was epic, nuff said. It was good to see you again. Anyway, school was school, I was half an hour late for lessons but whats new anyway haha. PBMC was good fun. though we only ran through my scene twice and was slacking/sleeping most of the time. haha and the whole cancelling intensive and shifting it from 3 to 6 is stupid I hate the school -.- this whole week is going to be hectic. And I've kindof made up my mind about dropping bio with the consent of my mum. so I guess thats good. but she still wants to talk to Mrs shen-.-

anyway, when I got home, Jeeva called in time for me to tell him what I wanted to tell him since morning HAHAHA.


( and because his ego is bigger than Germany )

I'm lucky to have good friends that made this night bearable. and its funny how the last person I thought who'd cheer me up, cheered me up haha.

Sucha fucked up night. But i told ya'll to go so hope you had fun. better 1 person to miss it than a whole group.

but anyway the day was good, P6 open house was okay, abut messy here and there and I'm so burnt. but some of the P6s are such snobs. bleargh. And today was my debut as a pitcher~ haha, and I was pretty okay since I striked out Linqi  twice. After that, went to eat with the softballers and it was one of the rare times Gloria came along. But Andrea had to miss it so we didnt get all 7 sec 3s. Anyway, had an epic talk with the softballers about the future, who's gonna get married first/ who's gonna have the most children/ Amanda's 20 children's names/ and all the random things that arent funny but we laugh about them anyway. Went home with Din beanz and Gabbie, laughed hard and I needed that. I cant really remember some of the funny stuff, and I'm not really in the mood to elaborate. But the softballers were the hilight of my day. Lets do this again.

I. AM. TIRED.

( She found a lonely salve )

anyway, I spent the day at starbucks doing emath holiday homework. Hoping I'd see that someone. but I didnt anyway haha. But I did see Ms Jenny and Mr Chong which was great cause its been a few years since I last saw them, and I really miss dance with them around. I never realised how hardcore I was about it in primary school haha.

but anyway, I've been kinda down. and as much as I hate to admit it but talking to the Harrith cheered me up quite alot, probably the few reasons why I never get fully sick of him, "dyou like raisins? then how bout a date?" HAHA. and Abang Ijat was good help too. I am surrounded by good friends.

they didnt know this, hohoho
conferencing with the brother and the sister.

anyway, detention was horrible, 5mins of PBMC was good, and shopping with the cousins was epic funny and damn tiring

School was funny and I got my first detention in a million years, and since everybody had training I went home, met Alyssa and went for a last minute lunch at LJS. Good talk, good laugh. Then I spent a good amount of time at the library to return and borrow books, then I went to Starbucks to sit, read and think. Yes, I was alone.

I am angsty all the time about everything, I miss a whole bunch of people, I'm awkward around a whole bunch of people, I am irritated at you and I have to stop cause my ego is going to destroy us. I need to stop changing my mind. I need to focus, I need to have a goal, I need to punch you so hard you'll regret ever messing with my head. I need to hit something hard, I need to stop denying the reason why I'm always hanging around at starbucks. I need to see you again, I need to realise it's probably never gonna happen. I am angry and I dont know why, I am wondering why I havent posted the postcard, I am wondering if it'll be awkward if I were to do what I'm planning to do. I am wondering why I've been wasting my time around people who dont deserve my time. I need to talk to you again, I need to grow up. I need to realise that I'm only 15, I need to know what I want. I need to prove to you that I am in fact straight, I dont know why you dont trust me enough, I need you to know that you're the only one that demands so much from me. I need to stop causing people trouble, I need to stop getting into trouble, I need to stop hurting everybody. and the list goes on.

I'm so burnt, so sad, so angsty, so disconnected, so dazed.